It Works...

Mediocrity has never been my strong suit

I still remember a woman asking me, “Does it need to be love?”

“What do you mean,” I reply.

“I got married quite recently, and I know it’s not love. I want more in my life, but it works.”

I shiver.

Frankly, I find it sad that colorful human beans with boundless potential settle for dull and less because “it works”.

A lot works, but do you feel alive?

1st of March…

The date that marks my birthday.

Nobody truly knows when I was born as I was found in a brown straw basket, wrapped in a cotton blanket, left on the steps of a church…, of a friend…, of a neighbor (there are three stories of how I was found and I still don’t know which one is true).

A note saying “His name is Tomas Martinez” was with me.

So, here I am on 1 March 2024, one year richer, and this year, I promised myself that no matter what, I’m celebrating it by the sea, outside the city, for at least one night by myself.

And I did.

The team at the hotel had even spotted my birthday in my booking and set my room with a heartfelt surprise:

Ahhh…

This reminded me to never underestimate the “little” things we do for ourselves and others.

This one landed in my heart.

A soft “thank you” left my lips as I read the note and for a split moment, a wave of sadness showered me seeing the two glasses.

Yes, I would have loved to share this day with someone special, but that sadness quickly dissolved in a bigger wave of love.

I deserve this, and oh my, I’m here to indulge it ALL.

The HUGE bed, the sound of seagulls, and the panoramic view of the sea - all with me, myself, and I.

Self-love at its finest.

Each birthday…

I reflect on my previous year to reconnect, learn, and find a new direction forward.

This time, I identified something that became pivotal to me, and I want to share it with you with the hopes that it can inspire an abundance of joy, love, and freedom (instead of a settlement for “Being realistic”, “It’s easy,“ or “It works”).

I felt it coming miles away…

A craving, a deep desire to disappear into nature with me, myself, and I.

And as I overhear my brother plan a vacation to Spain with his girlfriend in September, I slide up one morning with an innocent:

“Are you planning a vacation?”

“Yes, we are thinking of Greece or Spain,” he says. Of course, I think to myself. Sooo Swedish.

“Nice,” I reply. “If you want, I can take care of the cats.”

“Really?” he says. Giving me a confused look. “I think Kim will do it but we haven’t confirmed yet.

A week later he calls me, “You said you could take care of the cats right?”

“Yes,” I say.

“Great,” he continues. “Kim can’t do it so it would be great if you could.”

Yeah baby. I’m doing a Pippi dance in the middle of my flat.

See, my brother lives in a big house with red sides and white corners in the middle of nature - in Sweden.

And yes, there are two cats too: Tingeling and Tokan.

Meaning, I get to have it ALL to myself.

Silent retreat here I come.

For 7 days I’m alone…

The first thing I do is put my laptop and phone away.

Then I chop wood, rake leaves, cut the grass, go for jogs along routes I took as a teenager, and just sit there watching cows play with each other.

No phone, no TV, and no laptop.

It wasn’t easy at first, but pure bliss in only 4-5 days.

Hint: leaving the phone inside when I was outside was a game-changer on its own.

I’m catching myself giggling.

The simplicity of life. I light a fire in the fireplace during the dark fall evenings. Being creative with my cooking.

At one point, a storm somewhere down south causes a blackout so I light candles and snuggle with the cats.

Without them, I would have felt VERY lonely.

Around day 5 I realize my head is spinning with ideas as I’m about to go to sleep, I sleep like a baby, dream vividly (and remember what I dreamed), wake up early (without an alarm), slide into the kitchen doing a jigga-dee-boo so that the cats fly up the stairs, looking at me as if I’m an alien.

I’m remembering who I am.

A sense of aliveness energizes my body.

“It works”

Yes, it does, and if that’s what you feel content with, you have the full freedom to choose what works.

I, however, prefer to remember what fun feels like, what joy, love, and freedom feel like, and what gratitude and greatness feel like.

And, to stay true to my purpose, I will NOT encourage a colorful human bean like you to settle for dull and less because “it works”.

You are more than that.

These 7 days were pivotal.

Especially for my well-being and business.

I made more money in Q4 than in the entire year, I met a very interesting woman, I had fun, I was calm, and I remained healthy while seemingly everyone else fell sick.

It was the best investment of 2023.

On the flight back, I shared a brief post on LinkedIn about my experience and the idea of hosting a semi-silent retreat myself to give others the same transformational experience.

That post took off like a rocket and I already have a list of 10+ people interested (if you are too, simply reply with an “I'm interested!' and I'll add you to the list).

I love doing these reflections.

They bring me back and help clarify what often goes unnoticed.

Now, about to press send on this newsletter after a weekend by myself, marveling at the discoveries this reflection has provided, I remember a visual by Liz that summarizes it all so well:

I hope this was helpful.

This was one of my greatest learning lessons of 2023.

Which one was yours?

I’m always interested in learning about who reads my newsletters, and I’m inspired by others’ stories.

Yearning for more inspiration?

These are my top-read posts: A New Standard and My True Story.

P.S. Know that you can always reply to me, ask questions, and provide feedback to help me share stories and tips that are the most helpful at the moment.